Emmerdale’s Danny Miller explains the desperate despair that causes Aaron to lock himself in a garage, turn on the car engine and wait to die…
You’re a straight bloke playing a gay guy. Is it difficult for you to identify with Aaron’s turmoil?
“It is hard at times because I’ve never experienced anything like what Aaron’s going through. However it’s getting easier as time goes on and I’m getting to know him better. I also have a couple of gay mates who I ask for advice from time to time. I’ll maybe say, ‘How would you react in such-and-such-a situation?'”
We thought when Aaron started getting close to Jackson he’d made a bit of a breakthrough… What’s changed things?
“Adam seeing him kissing Jackson freaked him out. And when Adam tells Aaron they’re mates regardless and tries to be supportive, Aaron’s horrified. On the surface he’s rude and hostile to Adam, but inside he’s scared, frightened and
very worried what will happen now.”
Is that why he beats up Jackson? Does he blame him for Adam finding out?
“He doesn’t blame him, but when Jackson comes to The Woolpack Aaron’s terrified. Jackson touches him affectionately on the back of the neck and Aaron’s positive everyone will take this as a sign that he’s gay and lashes out and attacks Jackson. The police are called and Aaron’s arrested and charged with ABH.”
Is that how Chas finds out Aaron is gay?
“Paddy tells her because he feels out of his depth. He can’t keep it to himself when Aaron so obviously needs help. Chas is shocked but immediately supportive. But Aaron is horrified. It’s another person who knows plus his feelings towards his mother haven’t changed. He doesn’t want anything to do with her and certainly doesn’t want her being ‘there for him’. It’s the last thing he wants. He feels totally betrayed and alone… and locks himself in the garage, then turns the car engine on.”
Does he really want to kill himself or is it a cry for help?
“A bit of both. He’s scared and doesn’t want to die, but he feels backed into a corner and sees killing himself as the only way out…”
How close is he to death when Adam sees the smoke coming from the garage and rescues him?
“He’s seconds away. With Cain’s help, Adam pulls Aaron’s lifeless body from the car and out of the garage. He then gives Aaron mouth-to-mouth. How ironic is that, given Aaron first realised he was gay when he tried to kiss Adam?”
Are things going to get better or worse for Aaron?
“He’s depressed and tells Paddy he wishes he’d died but, as far as I know, he doesn’t try to kill himself again. He’s going to have to come to terms with who he is. Paddy and Adam will help him do this. But not his mother. Aaron still wants nothing to do with Chas. It’s his sexuality that’s changed, not his personality.”