Big Brother’s backwards day

Things are all back to front in the Big Brother house.

Housemates found the kitchen table had been strewn with the leftovers of a dinner party.

Earlybirds Ife and Corin knew something was up, because the mess hadn’t been there when they had first woken up. “If we hadn’t got up we’d be like ‘secret housemates’,” said Corin.

They were underwhelmed by the mess, and Ife pointed out ‘it stinks’. They also noticed that the clock was going backwards.

Then the spooky ventriloquist’s dummy in the living room, Bob Righter, which is an anagram of ‘Big Brother’ said: “Brother Big is this. Final song tonight.”

But they cheered up when Big Brother then played Lady Gaga’s Poker Face and the housemates started the day by dancing around the house.

As they cleaned up the kitchen Dave asked Mario: “What do you think is going on Moley?”

Mario said: “It’s obviously backwards day,” then added: “Maybe we can wind backwards to nominations and change it so I’m not on it.”

Housemates then discovered that there was a piping hot curry and beers in the storeroom for them to consume for ‘breakfast’. Nathan said: “This is exactly what we’ve just cleared away.”

As today is their shopping task day, no doubt the backwards theme has something to do with it.

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