1. We’re in touch with our emotions

Having watched years and years of people over-emoting on screen, it’s impossible not to be in touch with our sensitive sides.

2. We’re VERY stylish

How could we not be when we spend the whole week gazing at these glamourpusses?


3. We make a good brew

We’ve refined the art of the perfect cuppa having spent years making tea in three-minute ad breaks!

4. We’re a cheap date

We’d much rather dine in Argee Bhargee, Roy’s Rolls or The Hutch than extravagant Michelin-starred restaurants. “Two hotpots here, please!”

5. You’ll LOVE our families

…because after spending nights with the Dingles, the McQueens or the Mitchells, our calamitous clans will seem so much more… normal.


6. We understand the opposite sex

Having watched hours of devious, manipulative, controlling behaviour (and the occasional true romance, of course!) we know what the opposite sex is really like.

7. We’ll save you on Sky subscriptions

Who needs digital when you’ve got channels BBC1 to Channel 5?

8. We’re safety aware

We know that candles burning near lampshades and small children with music boxes are dangerous.


9. We’re trustworthy

You’ll never jealously wonder where we are – Monday to Friday we’re parked in front of the telly!

10. Passion is strictly ABOVE the waist

Our romances are chaste. None of that mucky stuff for us – it’s before the watershed!


11. We’ll have LOADS to talk about

The conversation never dries up when you need to work out whose mum is copping off with whose brother’s friend’s neighbour.


12. We’re funny

It’s impossible not to have a GSOH when you spend evening after evening with the likes of Sally, Steve, Kim and Kerry.


13. Holidays will be unforgettable

Why have a fortnight in the Maldives when you can have a day on the Corrie Tour or a wet weekend in Blackpool?