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Marlon and Paddy have been a bit like Emmerdale’s (ever-so-slightly) more adult version of Beavis and Butthead – especially in last year’s spin-off romp, Marlon and Paddy’s Big Night In. They’ve been through births, deaths and marriages together and Paddy thought there would be so much more. But Marlon has ended their double act. He’s not going to New Zealand with Paddy and Rhona; he’s staying in Emmerdale with Laurel. And, if Marlon has his way, Leo will be staying, too. But Paddy doesn’t know that when he makes a speech in the pub about the life waiting for him, Rhona and Leo in New Zealand…

Charity doesn’t know how sneaky Jai is being (planning to move Rachel – the mother of his unborn child – into a flat), but Rishi happily shows her how underhanded he has been to help them win a big contract for their new haulage business. Charity’s impressed – and it takes a lot to impress a dodgy Dingle.

Talking of dodgy Dingles… Last week Kerry went for Cain in a nice way. Now she knows he terrorised Amy after getting her pregnant and she goes for him in a very different way – one that might put him back on crutches!