From the folks who brought us last year’s titanic cheese-fest Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus comes this summer’s mockbuster eco-horror Mega Piranha, in which a former 1980s pop star and a member of the Brady Bunch take on a spawn of gigantic mutant fish.
When a prehistoric species of piranha escapes its natural habitat in the rivers of Venezuela, Special Agent Jason Fitch (Days of Our Lives actor and one-time Playgirl pin-up Paul Logan) and genetic scientist Sarah Monroe (I Think We’re Alone Now singer Tiffany) join forces to contain the amphibious menace.
But with the ferocious beasties rapidly increasing in size (it doesn’t matter why), it looks like nothing can stop the metal-chomping behemoths from devouring everything in their path – including battleships, helicopters and a team of scuba divers armed with what look like kids’ water-guns.
Time to call in Greg Brady – I’m mean Barry Williams – the head of something called the International Super Bunker. He calmly orders a nuclear strike in a bid to wipe the vermin out. Thankfully that fails (the megapiranha destroy the sub), which means its dinnertime for our fishy friends as they descend on the Florida coastline.
It’s exactly what you’d expect from The Asylum – quickly following in the footsteps of the king of the B’s Roger Corman with their low-rent rip-offs of big name blockbusters. The acting is pure ham while special effects are gloriously cheap, making even James Nguyen’s derisible Birdemic: Shock and Terror look professional, and while it doesn’t boast a killer scene like the Golden Gate scene in Mega Shark, the sight of the fish smashing into buildings with their tails flapping about is laugh out loud.
Mega Piranha was a big hit for Syfy when it screened back in April in the US, making it the channel’s most-watched movie of the year. UK cinema-goers can currently experience the horror for themselves during its limited big-screen run. And on August 9, the DVD comes out – just in time to capitalise on the 3D mega-budget Piranha remake which hits cinemas on August 20. Now I can’t wait to review that one.
Ridiculously hilarious B-movie hokum.